[color=cyan:8fdef1dd6d]STRANGE BUT TRUE!
These questions about South Africa were posted on a South African Tourism Website and were answered by the website owner - unfortunately we were forwarded these without any reference to the original website so if you know which website it comes from please let us know so we can give credit to them.

Q: Does it ever get windy in South Africa? I have never seen it raining on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Durban to Cape Town - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only two thousand kilometers, take lots of water...

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in South Africa? (Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes...?

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in South Africa? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town, Knysna and Jeffrey's Bay? (UK)
A...and what did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about Koala Bear racing in South Africa? (USA)
A: Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific.
A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not... oh forget it.
Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is north in South Africa? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into South Africa? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow, straight after the Koala Bear races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in South Africa? (France)
A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South Africa? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes. Gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in South Africa? (France)
A: Only at Christmas

Q: Are there killer bees in South Africa? (Germany)
A: Not yet, but for you, we'll import them.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Cape Town and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter-gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in South Africa who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-me-ri-ca, which is where YOU come from. All South African snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: I was in South Africa in 1969, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Hillbrow. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.

Q: Will I be able to speek English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first. [/color:8fdef1dd6d]

Hey that was awsome. I love those. sorta like


on the back of a hair dryer: dont use while asleep.

And I thought it was just Australia they said that stuff about - have a look how similar these are.
From
"www.holiday-wa.net/VisitorInformation.asp"


The following questions about Australia are from potential visitors. They were posted on an Australian Tourism Web site and the answers are the actual responses by the site webmaster, who obviously has a typical Australian sense of humor.

Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA but not Virginia )
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.


Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney- can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Harvey Bay? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?


Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA but still not Virginia)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not.. oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA ... whatever...)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.


Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.


Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is.. oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.


Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? ( UK)
A: You are a British politician, right?


Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.


Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.


Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: Do you have perfume in Australia? (France)
A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.


Q: Can you tell me the regions in Tasmania where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.


Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)
A: Only at Christmas.


Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.


Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first

[color=cyan:f02695c6ef][img:f02695c6ef]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/fragend/confused-smiley-013.gif[/img:f02695c6ef]

Pretty similar..... [/color:f02695c6ef]

[quote:4c2c1281e0="AdrianTregoning"][color=cyan:4c2c1281e0][img:4c2c1281e0]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/fragend/confused-smiley-013.gif[/img:4c2c1281e0]

Pretty similar..... [/color:4c2c1281e0][/quote:4c2c1281e0]

oh well, it looks like the original would rather by from down under (austria/australia, which way is north etc), but who cares? they are pretty funny either way

and... i bet some potential toursist did ask such questions at one point

[color=cyan:740ee796b2]Amazing how many people think that lions roam the streets here [/color:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-019.gif[/img:740ee796b2]

[img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-040.gif[/img:740ee796b2] [color=red:740ee796b2]he he he he he[/color:740ee796b2][img:740ee796b2]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/tiere/animal-smiley-040.gif[/img:740ee796b2]

and amazing that everyone thinks americans have a dumbass as president oh wait we do

[color=cyan:ff4cbf5c38]may I suggest something...........[/color:ff4cbf5c38][img:ff4cbf5c38]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/lachen/laughing-smiley-003.gif[/img:ff4cbf5c38]

[img:ff4cbf5c38]www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/waffen/violent-smiley-012.gif[/img:ff4cbf5c38]